all-star in-game live rhyme-O-mat

8:53 p.m.
Lincecum hits the hand of Jeter
Derek's lucky it wasn't a heater
9:00 p.m.
Two runs in in top of first
The hits were bad but the error was worse
9:12 p.m.
Rosenthal talking about Halladay trade
A typical, unsourced sideline tirade
9:23 p.m.
Three straight singles and a ground-rule double
Leave the AL in a bit of trouble
9:53 p.m.
This game is anything but slow
Four innings took as long as pre-game show
10:04 p.m.
He hits for average and for power
Tying the game is the spiffy Joe Mauer
10:14 p.m.
Adam Jones rips it to right
But the outs are piling up fast tonight
10:18 p.m.
Taco Bell airs a goofy ad
Christ, that food is freakin bad
10:29 p.m.
I hate to ask but I've never known...
Why are the Oceans "white with foam"?
10:34 p.m.
Hawpe hits a shot off Boston closer
But Carl Crawford, at the wall, says 'No sir'
10:43 p.m.
Granderson scampers after a clout
Good time for a triple, with only one out
10:49 p.m.
Adam Jones with a sac fly to right
The go-ahead run, late in the night!
10:57 p.m.
It's the All-Star Game, so say what you might
But it sure is strange seeing Adam in Right
11:07 p.m.
Howard strikes out on a ball in the dirt
An NL late comeback is rendered inert
11:20 p.m.
Slamming the door is Mariano
The Americans make it 13 in a row!