all-star pre-game live rhyme-O-mat

8:03 p.m.
Talking trash was President Obama
He made fun of Pujols' mama
8:08 p.m.
Adam Jones gets announced
NL Pitching he will trounce
8:15 p.m.
Yadier's faux-hawk looks atrocious
The St. Louis fans are quite precocious
8:20 p.m.
FOX sucks up to 'everyday fans'
But Rupert has nefarious plans
8:26 p.m.
Can't hit a ball? Bad with the glove?
You can still be a star at Serve.gov
8:36 p.m.
The pomp and circumstance has extended
Long after pre-game show should have ended
8:39 p.m.
Barack throws out the game's first pitch
FOX wrecks the shot with a camera glitch
8:42 p.m.
Here's Joe Buck and Tim McCarver
With their folksy brand of baseball palarver
8:49 p.m.
It's nearly bed-time in the East
The game is underway, at least