Gather 'round, kiddies, for RIME of SCAPEGOAT MANAGER.
See his eye as he stops one of three
Mesmerises one of the minor leaguers
Stay here and listen to the nightmares of The Show.
And the games play on, as the innings pass by
Caught by his spell and the Manager tells his tale.
Flying West to the land of the Losing Streaks
To a place where few Teams have been
Through the boots and the Ks comes a Rookie
Hailed in Team's name, hoping good luck he brings.
And the Team plays on, back to the East
Through insult and injury and the Rookie pitches on.
The Manager pulls the Rook of good omen
The Bloggers cry against what he's done
But when the game ends, some justify him
And make themselves a part of the crime.
Playing on and on and East across the streak
Playing on and on and East the losses mount.
The baseball Gods begin with their vengeance
A terrible curse a thirst has begun
The organization blames bad luck on the Manager
About his neck, the losses are hung.
And the curse goes on and on for Team.
And the verse goes on and on for them and me.
Day after day, night after night,
Team struck no win nor home run
As idle as a painted ship upon a painted ocean
Victories, victories everywhere and
all the averages did stink
Victories, victories everywhere
from Team's grasp did shrink.
There sits the Manager
There comes the call from the GM.
But how can he win with so little talent in the 'Pen?
See … onward he comes
Onward he nears out of the sun
See, he has no crew
He has no life, wait but there’s two.
Andy and Angelos
They tell the Manager it's Time...
The Manager's bound to tell of his story
To tell this tale back in Double A
To teach Team's word by his own example
That's just the game, that's just Baseball's way.
And the minor leaguers are sad and wiser men
And the tale goes on and on and on.
Sure beats working at DENNY'S!
* uhh. Classics as re-imagined by Iron Maiden, to be accurate